Monday 28 June 2021

Monday

 Good morning, everyone.  It isn't a very pleasant morning; it's been raining overnight and looks as if it's going to rain again very soon.  What's the betting that in a few weeks we will be moaning about a heat wave and wishing for more rain though!  That's just how it always seems to go.
Ideally, I'd love sunny days and rainy nights.  That's what I'd order from the weather catalogue!  Great for the fruit and veg.

Yesterday was a very strange day.  It seemed to go on for ever.  I did some sorting out and clearing, somewhat limited by the fact the the relevant bin is full!  John looked up paperwork in order to take it in to the registrar (or whoever) this morning.  We contacted the minister who advised us on who does what, I sent out what felt like endless emails (thank goodness for the Internet) and replied to several.

One thing I was very happy about.  Mum and Dad had some beautiful 'best' china, Wedgwood, expensive at the time but not actually fetching all that much nowadays.  To my delight, Beth loves it and is very happy to take it.  My parents would be so very pleased.

It's awful, throwing things away.  It's like you are throwing the person away.  Yesterday I ditched copious amounts of pants and socks (why so many??  I don't know) as they can't be sold on.  I am hopeful that the charity shop will take the rest of Dad's clothing after I have weeded out any really tatty stuff - it's good quality and well looked after.

Enough of all that!
This morning, the church that Dad attended is opening its doors for an hour and I will be going along for a short time.  That's going to be hard, I think, especially if people cry.  He was such a big presence at church that they will miss him terribly.

Then I have to do a few tasks such as stopping the paper and paying the final bill, returning some slippers to Hotter that he never got to wear and sorting things out in the fridge.
Then I'm going home.  I need some time at home now, in my happy place.  A few days at home feels wonderful.  Beth's coming over this evening after a work and staying for a meal - something simple.

John is staying here to deal with all the official stuff.  I am very grateful to him for doing all of that as we are joint executors.  I may have to come back if joint signatures are required but, if not, I will come back on Friday for the weekend.

I've been planning resuming my normal life again after a month (more or less) out.  I have contacted my students' families.  The eleven plussers found another tutor as I suggested, thank goodness, as time is so short but the other two are happy for tuition to resume next Monday.  I'm going to Lindsey on Wednesday to talk and for some massage on my still uncomfortable calves (although they are slowly improving)  And resuming Slimming World on Friday morning.  Jen has started a new daytime group which suits me much better than evening groups so I'll be there, hammering on the door, to start losing the well-over-a-stone I have put on by comfort eating and drinking over the last month.  

So, the plan is to be at Dad's from Friday to Monday morning and live my own life Monday to Friday lunchtime.  Fingers crossed.

Your messages/comments over the last few days have been just wonderful.  I can't thank you all enough for such kindness.  They have really helped and you are all lovely.  A heartfelt thank you to you all.  xx

28 comments:

  1. That sounds a good plan.There will be lots of ups and downs but you are sounding really positive.Thinking about you.Barbarax

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    1. Getting a routine back again will help tremendously, I think.
      xx

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  2. The paperwork is the worst part - so many people to contact.
    I'm glad you are going home during the week - sounds a good plan.
    Take care

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    1. John is dealing with all the phoning, etc, bless him. xx

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  3. Good luck Joy your plan sounds very organised and I'm glad you have help with the paperwork which is a real headache which you don't need at a time of grief.

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    1. I daresay I will do some but it's great to have John alongside and taking the lead. xx

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  4. I am so sorry to hear of your dad's passing. Huge (((hugs))) I'm glad you have your brother to help sort out the paperwork, it can get overwhelming doing it all by yourself. And yes, the throwing away bit is very hard. Keeping busy and being organised helps you through the first few weeks xxx

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  5. Thinking of you and so pleased you have help with the paperwork for it seems so much at the beginning.
    Take care.
    Love
    Hazel 🌈🌈

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    1. Things like this can be a bit overwhelming at first, can't they. xx

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  6. Sending all my love Joy. So sorry to hear about dad but I know that you will have so many treasured memories of both your parents. Take your time with things now and make sure you look after yourself. Heartfelt condolences to you and your brother xx

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    1. Lots of lovely memories, yes. They are helping considerably. xx

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  7. So glad you have a plan to have time at your own home while finishing up things that need done at your parents' home on the weekend. Travel safely and rest well.

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    1. Thanks, Debbie. It's not too far to drive, which is a blessing. xx

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  8. Spending the weekdays at home is a good idea. Surround yourself with your own things and routines. Good of your brother to handle all the technical issues (so many), while you focus on the disposition of things in the house. Take care of yourself. Thinking of you. Safe travels.

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    1. Thanks, Mary. It is good to be home again. xx

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  9. I'm glad you're getting back to your own home. This initial stage of notifying everyone and keeping up with all the other things that need to be done is, I think, the hardest part so it's good you and John can support each other to get it done. Have I remembered correctly that you have another brother who lives abroad or am I mixing you up with someone else?

    Take care of yourself. Thinking of all of you.

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    1. You're right. Dave lives in the USA and what with quarantine rules at present, etc, he's a bit stuck.
      xx

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  10. Just want to let you know that I am thinking of you right now. xx

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  11. Only just read the news Joy - I feel so sad for you and your family and losing your dad will leave a big hole in your life. Thinking of you and sending virtual hugs. xx

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    1. Yes, I do feel quite empty at the moment. But it will fill with lovely memories, I am sure. xx

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  12. I have been missing the past few days and I am so sorry to read this. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. It is really hard to go through things and I had the same feeling as you when I went through my parents things. I am glad that John is with you and you can support eachother.

    God bless.

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    1. It has to be done, doesn't it? I'm sorry you had this too although, as Diane said on her blog, it comes to just about all of us sooner or later. xx

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  13. I'm sorry about your dad. You sound like you are coping well. Wedgewood china is my favorite. It is so delicate and lovely.

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    1. I'm trying to. :-) The chine really is lovely and it's great that Beth loves it. xx

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